June is bustin' out all over
The ocean is full of Jacks and Jills (or is that Hils ?!),
With the little tail a-swishing'
Ev'ry lady fish is wishin'
That a male would come
And grab 'er by the gills!
I've always loved the musical Carousel and I realised that one of the verses could sort of be DD related, OK so just indulge me in my fantasy for a minute ... "the little tail", or was that a paddle "a swishin" and the "lady fish wishin' " that she would be grabbed "by the gills" for a swift spanking perhaps!
I wonder what other songs I can adapt for DD, off the top of my head I can think of only one other which is from another musical, Cabaret, "Helga is the baby. I'm just like a father to her. So when she's bad, I spank her. And she's very, very, very, very, very bad"! Sounds like I need to do a bit of Google-ing tonight!! Unless you, dear lurkers, can help me out with some ideas.
June already, nearly half way through the year, where did that almost half year go so far, anyone know, it sort of flew past without me noticing!
Life has once again been a bit challenging, I have been struggling with my submissive urges once again, I seem to go for long periods where I can manage to submit without too much trouble and then, wham, I hit a brick wall, and me submit, no way, no siree!
In a vague attempt to come to terms with my newly emerging persona I discussed the issues surrounding Dominance/submission and their extremely close cousins sadism/masochism with my therapist. I have been struggling to come to terms with the realisation that I should wear both the submissive and masochist "hats". In the surprisingly philosophical interlude which followed this revelation from me, he pointed out to me that these are actually extremely normal, natural states, "never" said I, but "actually yes", said he, "in fact life is a cycle of S/M or D/s". If I had not been lying down (sadly not on the "stereotypical" leather couch, I love leather - but that is another story ho ho!!) at the time I probably would have keeled over in amazement. Natural, normal, NEVER!!! His explanation went something like this...
Let's start with sex ("a very good place to start" as Julie Andrew's would have perhaps said!!) , this is in itself is about an act of dominance on the part of the man and submission for the woman, he has to have enough dominance (fuelled by the hormone testosterone which also of course fuels aggression, without enough of this aggression he just can't keep it up!!) to provide the possibility to 'penetrate' her and she has to submit to such penetration. Then in a further act of sadism the sperm has to "penetrate" the egg which has to submit to this if a new life is to be conceived.
The mother then carries this "foreign being", in her womb for the next 9 months (assuming that all went OK in the previous stage and the egg was not 'running' about the fallopian tubes screaming, "submit, ha, you must be f*****g joking"). The "blissful" state of pregnancy is in itself somewhat masochistic, think morning sickness, heartburn, the little blighter tap dancing on your bladder etc, etc. After all babies are basically extremely effective sadists, "sucking" all they need from the mother (often to her disadvantage, and clearly without her consent!!) in order to give themselves the best start in life.
Finally the mother has to turn from this submissive being, who allows this to take place into a dominant aggressive one, "expelling" the intruder from her body into the world. As a mother of 4 I can tell you that this is the ultimate "masochistic" act and we haven't gone anywhere near breastfeeding yet! I could go on with the theme but I think you get the gist.
In summary, as I guess you'll all need a brief summary after all that philosophising, labelling myself as either or both (submissive and/or masochist) should not be considered as meaning I am mad or bad, I am just part of the natural cycle of life!
Hmmm, food for thought, or what!
Hil
6 comments:
Hil,
And to think I wanted to remarry and hopefully have children, lol!!!
I think you have a great point and yes each of those steps reflects D/s. Once you start to look through the prism of DD - the profile of leaders and followers are everywhere.
All the best,
K
Hil, I thought your therapist's explanation was right on target! "Normal" is not the sugar coated version we would all like to believe! Sometimes I think we simply dare to explore parts of ourselves other's would simply rather not look at. It doesn't mean it is not there for all of us. Interesting! Sara
It's interesting that you are able to talk to your therapist about the subject. I've often wondered how a person could go to a therapist to address an issue, without revealing TTWD. And if you try to leave it out, or hide it, well, that defeats the purpose of therapy.
Hugs,
Hermione
I started to see my therapist four or so years ago for a completely different reason, to help me cope with a messy divorce, because I have continued to see him and thus trust him explicitly I have been able to talk over all these new issues which have now entered my life, or perhaps I should say have re-entered my life as they have always been there, just hidden. But yes, having a professional with whom you can be 100% truthful is wonderful in sorting out such complex issues
Thanks for commenting
Hil
Hello! I agree with Hermione. I'm glad that you can talk about this with your counselor. I feel that the stress buster aspects of kink as well as spirituality are really either ignored, judged or are unrated in therapy. Lucky you to have a terrific person.
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